Special Guest Blogger (Dan, the Husband/Father)

So I thought that I would give this blogging thing a try. I joked with Emily if I could post as a Special Guest Blogger on our adoption blog. I am not sure who is going to read this, but I do know that the right person will find this blog and for them, it will mean something.

I want to explain what it is like in my role as a father. I am lucky in that with my job I can work from home time to time, and today was one of those days. We had a large snowstorm and I didn't want to drive on the freeways, so I worked from my home office. The best part about working from home is that I get to hear all of the sounds of Dawson and Emily going about their day. In fact they strategically placed themselves right outside my office (with my door open) and started playing superhero's!. Emily would exclaim "I am going to get you Batman", and Dawson would yell "No way", and then you would hear them tussle and giggle as they wrestled on the floor together.

I smiled the whole time while I was working and then Dawson yelled, Daddy come play with us. So I got up and pretended to close and lock my door (like I needed to concentrate on my work ;). Then when I heard both Dawson and Emily sigh because I wasn't going to join them, I burst out of the door and using my best Superhero voice and chased a squealing Dawson into his room, where I captured him to his utter delight.

It was a fun moment, one that was put together at the spur of the moment. The thing is, within a few weeks I won't remember anything special in particular about my work day, but I will remember that small moment that our family had sandwiched in between work and responsibility.

Being a father has been an absolute joy for me. I sometimes wish I had a pause button right now, where I could keep Dawson at this age, but then I realize that if I did then I wouldn't experience little league baseball, his baptism, his high school years, mission/marriage and so on.

I am SO grateful that Emily and I will be able to experience the joy of parenthood with another child. I used to wonder how God could love all of his children equally. Sure enough he had to of had favorties, or those who he loved more than others. And when Dawson was first born, I even thought that myself... How could I ever love another Child as much as him?

But then a crazy thing happened. My heart grew as he did and now not only do I have an unlimited amount of love for him, but I have this area in my heart, separate from him, that is already present, and constantly growing. It is reserved for my next child or even children. It is an amazing feeling and I feel that I already know and love my next children, although I do not know them personally yet or where they will come from.

Not only do I have this love reserved from our children, but I have an immense appreciation, love and respect for our next Birthmom. Emily and I hold a special reverence for these strong, couragous, and selfless women who choose adoption for their child.

Well, that is my first blog. Maybe I will return with another special guest entry.

For whoever is reading this and for whatever reason, please know that we love you and you are in our prayers and thoughts on a constant basis.

- Dan (Superhero Wannabe)

Why we adopt

I was about to make dinner tonight and I had the thought...  I should post why we adopt. When I was little,  I would see pregnant women thought someday I'm going to have a belly like that, but then a feeling would come and I would think about adoption. When Dan and I had first met, I told him I would adopt some children, I asked if he was okay with that, he said yes. This was  days after we met. I had never mentioned that to anyone else I had dated. It never came to mind to tell anyone else.

About a year later, I had a surgery for endometriosis, I was 22. Dan was there at the hospital and so was my mom. The doctor came in and apparently told Dan that I have good hips for carrying children. The next month Dan and I became engaged. We went to the same doctor to talk about the surgery and our future together. He told us since I just had surgery it would be a good time for us to try to get pregnant once we became married in a few months. It was a little shocking, not a big shock just we were worried by it.  We went out to eat after our appointment. We felt a little doomed. Dan and I have this funny thing we will go to call each other at the same time or we will both feel the same thing (not always but when it really matters). Neither of us felt like she should try for kids as newlyweds. It’s not that we had a big list of things we wanted to do before we had kids, it’s just that it didn’t feel like the right timing.

Three years later, we thought we would try to start our family, it just felt right. I felt worried, I felt excited. Long story short, it didn’t work.  That is in April. Wee began to get a few things in line to be prepared, like our finances and a few other things. No big deal, many people try for a few months and get pregnant, many after three months. After those three months a pit began to brew in my stomach. I do not know how to explain it. I know it had only been three months but a feeling came over me. A realization came over me that something else was planned for us. I went down town to walk the Gateway. ALL I SAW were shops for pregnant women, babies and even harder it seemed as though every women that was there had a cute little belly on them, they could shop at those shops with excitement. I went back to our hotel, and prayed for hours. I felt sick, I thought my heart was going to pop, I couldn’t breathe. I felt nauseated, when you just feel helpless. All of the sudden I felt like I was the only one that existed, and alone. I was supposed to meet my friend to go out to eat, oh I wanted to cancel but I didn’t feel right about telling her not to come. Just as she was headed to pick me up I had a thought, “ don’t worry about all those women who are pregnant” and I had a feeling that everything would be okay. I did not know how, but when my friend and I went out, it was as if I couldn’t feel anything when I saw someone who was expecting a child within.  I felt no sorrow, no ache and I felt lighter. I wondered where our child was and when we would have one but the ache for that moment was gone. A month later, I felt that we should adopt. Dan and I had a long talk.  Needless to say the pieces of the puzzle came together. In April of 2007 we brought home our baby boy one year after we first decided it was time to start our family.

To succeed

I read this quote just recently and I am not sure who said it,


“The reason people fail instead of succeed is because they trade what they want most for what they want at the moment.” 



This is what Dan and I are really focusing on right now. There are so many things that we want to be and I hope that as time goes on we can achieve our goals so that we can instill the important things to our children.

Pumpkins

So it is officially time that we retire our Halloween pumpkins. Isn't it CRAZY it went by so fast. They have been proudly displayed outside for all to see. I took a second glance at them and I am sad to say that they are soggy so with reluctance until next year here is our tribute to our pumpkins. We will miss you pumpkins. As much as we love Halloween and usually begin to count down until next year, I am excited for Christmas and spring time. the new year and new things to come.

CAMEL

Last night we headed out to the Tabernacle to watch a live reenactment of the Christmas Nativity scene. It was really neat to explain to our son what it meant. When it was over we headed outside and they had a real camel for us to see. It was Awesome to say the least. To think about the three wise men traveling with camels made it all that much real for us.

YOU ARE MORE!!!

I was online today and somehow rather quickly I felt inspired to pop onto this BLOG I wanted to share it so turn up your stereo and let me know what you think.


 "The past does not equal the future." -

Elia Gourgouris

Hey it's us

Hey, It's Dan and Emily. We are looking to add to our family by adoption. Last night our 3 1/2 year old son was jumping on the bed and he said, I just wuv my birf (birth) mom! We then proceeded to ask him question to see what he has understood about his adoption. He knows that he grew in his birth moms belly and what her name is and what his birth dads name is. He knows what city they live in. And he knows their family members names that we have contact with. We were so impressed with what he has retained. 

We began talking to him about his adoption the first day he came home to us, he was 6 weeks old.We never wanted adoption to be a surprise that he learns about later in life. We are so grateful that we have contact with his birth parent's and some of their family. It gives him a chance to learn about his family and where he came from. We feel it is imperative that we build his future starting at the beginning before his adoption.  we can look at him and see features that he has from both his birth parents. His eye color is piercing just like his mom's, his sports and agility just like his dad's. We are so proud to have him. We want him to know who he is, that's why having contact with his family is so wonderful. It allows him to develop a relationship with them and learn about all that he can become!